Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Much-Anticipated Thanksgiving Quiz Answers

I know you've been waiting with great anticipation for these answers. You've probably even taken a break from you holiday preparations at exactly 6:00 just so you could gain this valuable knowledge. If you haven't read yesterday's entry, you'll need to do so or this entry won't make sense.

First, Scenario Two was the true scenario. I know. Shocking, isn't it?

Following are the character names and a notation with the character not found in A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving.

1. Surely you all know this is Woodstock. Easy starter question.








2. Snoopy












3. Schroeder, who by the way was not in A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving.










4. Sally Brown, Charlie's sister:















5. Patricia Reichardt, A.K.A. Peppermint Patty:

















6. Marcie Johnson

















7. Lucy Van Pelt














8. Linus Van Pelt:













9. Charlie Brown (tough one, huh?)




Happy Thanksgiving to all of you and yours. We have so much for which to be thankful.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Thanksgiving Quiz Night

Like many families in America, we are preparing to travel tomorrow for the Thanksgiving holiday. Knowing the laundry, planning and packing that needs done in the next 20 hours (hours during which we also need to sleep), I asked the big girls to start a load of laundry and microwave a casserole from the freezer for supper. Since tonight is quiz night, I'm going to give you two possible scenarios and you get to choose which one is true.

SCENARIO ONE:

Me: Girls, we're leaving tomorrow to go out of town for Thanksgiving. Could one of you put a load of laundry in the washer and the other nuke a casserole for supper?

Katie: Wow! We get to visit family all weekend? I can't wait! What do I need to do after I fix supper?

Hailey: Sure! Can I do TWO loads of laundry? I love going to Wichita.

Hannah: Stop me alone! ("Leave me alone!" -- I don't know why she says it this way, but it's hilarious.)

SCENARIO TWO:

Me: Girls, we're leaving tomorrow to go out of town for Thanksgiving. Could one of you put a load of laundry in the washer and the other nuke a casserole for supper?

Katie: Do we have to spend our WHOLE vacation in Wichita? Why can't we just stay hooome. You're not gonna be making lists, are you???

Hailey: When am I going to have time to do this homework project? It's due December 5th!

Hannah: Stop me alone! ("Leave me alone!")

Feeling the love, I decided to spend my precious time wisely by turning on the idiot box and flipping through our four channels. A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving was on, which inspired me to wisely use even more time to download these pictures. Can you name these Peanuts characters?

One last question: Which of the following characters was NOT in A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving?

Tune in tomorrow at 6:00 p.m. for the answers. If I don't get back online before Thursday: Happy Thanksgiving!

1.








2.












3.










4.















5.

















6.

















7.














8.














9.

Friday, November 21, 2008

You Tell Me...

...Is this sweet? Or a little creepy?




Yes, this is a roll of toilet paper. Carl left it for us. I suggested to him that he choose a color other than brown for future toilet paper correspondence.

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UPDATE: Carl explained to me that we were out of TP in this bathroom so he procured this roll from the new bathroom for the next person in need. What says love more than a re-loaded TP holder? Especially when it's actually written in brown and white.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

ICK

Yesterday my neighbor phoned, opening our conversation with, "I need to tell you something that will affect how we watch our girls while they're outside." My first thought was, "Cr*p. What did Hannah do now?" I mentally flipped back through the days, wondering if she had been outside unattended or maybe fed the same neighbor's penned-up dog something strange. The neighbor has ducks. Did Hannah let the ducks out?

Cautiously I replied, "OK?"

I only wish it simply involved ducks or dogs.

Before I continue, allow me to describe our small-town block, which is divided into eight very small lots with adjacent back yards. Four of us basically share the same unfenced back yard. Thankfully three of those homes include children, counting my telephoning neighbor whose 13 year old daughter has become a close friend of Katie's and Hailey's. The fourth house is a tiny 500-square-foot (give or take) peach-colored rental that is mere feet from my phoning neighbor's back porch.

My neighbor told me, "A sexual predator moved into the little peach house beside us." She e-mailed me the website where I learned that this individual (I refuse to call him a man) has been convicted of--and I quote--"aggravated indecent solicitation of child; less than 14 years old to commit or submit to unlawful sexual act." This same individual is similar in size to me: 5'2" and 125 pounds.

ICK is an understatement.

Our daughters' swing set sits just outside of his window. With innocence, naivete and a presumed sense of safety our girls walk back and forth between our homes to play or to borrow a cup of sugar. We chose small town America in part for the notion that we could live in a modern day Mayberry.

I'm not ignorant. I've cautioned my daughters, explaining sexual predators and pointing out that the bad guy is rarely a bogey man dressed in black. We've discussed situations that place them in danger. Mayberry or no, I never let them walk anywhere alone--except across their own back yard.

Did I mention...ICK?

I showed this individual's picture to Katie and Hailey and explained what he had done to a girl their age. I cautioned them that never EVER would he be the person that I gave information to in the event of an emergency, so never EVER believe him if he tells them something has happened to their mom or dad or whomever so come on in and use his phone or wait in his house or...whatever. They aren't to talk to him. They aren't to approach him. If they see him, they are to run away. Just get away.

Evidently Hailey didn't quite get this because her first question was, "If we see him, can we punch him?"

After laughing at this I explained again that she should simply stay away from him, but by all means she has my permission to punch him if that should ever become necessary--which it shouldn't if she STAYS AWAY FROM HIM. I also pointed out that, though I don't think Hannah is this individual's typical target, we all need to keep a special eye on her.

My heart is heavy. Evil resides in my back yard and its presence threatens those most dear to me. I'm thankful that the winter months are upon us, when we keep indoors to avoid the cold. And I'm hopeful that this individual will move before spring.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Doe, A Deer

I love musicals. I used to love The Sound of Music. That was until Hannah decided to watch it daily, sometimes several times a day. I'm not exaggerating. When my friend Sheri stops in for her break, she's no longer surprised to hear the Von Trapp Family Singers, but she has stopped hesitating in asking Hannah to turn it off for the ten minutes she's here.

Some people can quote quirky or "cool" movies like, say, Monty Python. One friend, who I'm sure prefers to remain nameless, can quote Goldmember. (I haven't seen it myself). Me? I can quote The Sound of Music. I can name all seven children. I have all of the songs (mostly) memorized, or at least the annoying ones. I've even awakened to have those nuns singing How Do You Solve a Problem Like Maria? over and over so that I couldn't fall back asleep. Again--no exaggeration.

I have to admit I love watching Hannah watch the movie and mangle the words. The previews on the VHS include several Rodgers and Hammerstein musicals like The King and I, South Pacific and Oklahoma! Hannah sings "OOOOOO-homa...wind ah ah wah....pain...ah ah wheat...ah smewhs good...."

The words are "the waving wheat can sure smell sweet." At least she gets the context.

When the musical finally begins, Hannah twirls in a circle like Maria and sings, "The hiwhs awive with soun' ah mooosic."

I have confidence in confidence alone...

I am sixteen going on seventeen... I wish.

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens, bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens...

Doe, a deer, a female deer...

Which reminds me. It's deer season and the rut is on. I am once again a Deer Season Widow. I suppose I should be thankful that, unlike golf, deer season is limited. But when it's here, it's all I hear about. The same man who cannot turn down a job or let down a customer for any reason (even if his wife is puking her guts out while her infant sits in the bouncy seat next to her, though said wife harbors no grudges, ay?) is suddenly able to quit work at 3:00 so that he can don cammo and climb into a deer stand. Poor economy? Low bank account? No problem. I'm sure he justifies it by reassuring himself that he is providing food, putting meat on the table.

Next time I really want his attention, I think I'll put on a doe costume and sprinkle it with essence of doe. Talking is overrated.

How do you solve a problem like...

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

For Christmas I Want...

Last night we watched The Last of the Mohicans. Hailey asked, "What's a Mohican? Isn't that something you wear on your foot?"

Yeah, I'd like a pair of mohicans for Christmas.

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I apologize for the ridiculous delay between this post and my last. First and foremost I must make a clarification for those family members who have checked this blog over the past month only to see the same face gracing the page. That is NOT Isaac. That is NOT Carl. It's...

ED.

And his fashion sense hasn't improved much. heh heh.

Sheesh, so much has happened this past month-and-a-half. I fought an infection that took me away from blogging, then swore I would post "soon." Have you ever needed to send a thank you card, but procrastinated until you felt your simple card should include a personal letter as well? Only you didn't write the short personal letter, you procrastinated so much longer that you felt obligated to deliver the thank you personally with a gift or a batch of cookies or some such thing?

That's how the blogging procrastination effected me. I wrote a couple of posts explaining my absence, but they were somewhat depressing and, well, blah. So I deleted them. The next week I felt like I owed my reader (now singular I fear) something especially witty or funny to make up for the delay. Did I do that? Obviously, no. Instead I left Ed's face on my front page and wasted hours upon hours reading J.D. Robb novels, I'm ashamed to admit.

Finally, I postponed what now felt like an obligation to write the blog equivalent of War and Peace by beginning an unbelievably time consuming Christmas gift project. When will I ever learn that I am NOT a crafty person? To those of you who will receive these homemade gifts, I only ask: please, act as if you love them. OK?

So, over the next few days I will write about Hannah's excellent IEP, the fact that I am a deer-hunting widow now that the rut is on, and my recent membership at the YMCA where I am by far the youngest member of their arthritis aquacize class.

I only hope this post is long enough that you are now required to scroll down before you see Ed's face.