Gratitude and Humor

This is my first of two blog entries today.

Ever since trying and failing to publish a poem in sixth grade, I've thought that I would publish something "someday." Next June I turn forty, that imaginary line in the middle of our lives where we issue ourselves midterms grades. I realize "someday" needs to get here or I'll receive an F in at least one subject. I began blogging as a step in that direction, deciding that at the very least I will compile the stories of my children's childhoods and "publish" a book just for them...probably not before June, though.

Often I feel led to do something--like blogging--for a specific reason. However, once I'm into the process of that "something," I realize my original reason wasn't the only nor even the most important one. (That idea could be it's own blog). As I've blogged more-or-less consistently the past month a serendipitous second reason has surfaced: gratitude and a sense of humor have grown inside me--for my family, for my circumstances, for the little things of every day. Why? Because I watch for them, then I focus on every detail so that I can better write about them. We all know what happens to the things on which we focus: they grow.

I've tried keeping a gratitude journal several times in the past, but that never "did it" for me. A list of good things isn't substantial enough to compete with the fourteen other lists I keep on paper and in my head: to-do lists, shopping lists, pathetic score-keeping-with-my husband lists. In contrast, blogging forces me to be in the present, to completely experience each memorable moment, then to re-experience it at the computer keyboard. I guess I don't have to make my thoughts public. I publish my blogs, though, because I appreciate the comments and the feedback, both of which make me a better writer. And that takes us back to paragraph one.

So, now that I've told you all how grateful I am, I'm going to publish this post and write the second blog of today that is screaming to get out of my head and into the internet.