Friday, December 14, 2007

Everybody's Minds are in the Gutter!

My mind is decidedly clean (for once), but not those around me.

Before I go on: this entry is not suitable for young children or for people who are easily offended. With that said...

First, I am planning the 5th grade Christmas party with a friend of mine, for which we originally decided to serve meatballs. Bad idea. Katie doesn't like meatballs. My friend e-mailed me that her daughter doesn't like meatballs and the other mother helping us said, "Not very many kids like meatballs." In reply to my friend's e-mail, I thought I would be witty and use pig latin and thus typed, "It sounds like ixnay on the eatballsmay."

I didn't think anything of it until my friend replied, "Did you actually say eatballsmay???!!!"

I have been so slow today that I had to re-read it a couple of times before I realized her point!

Second, I have given my Christmas wish list to my husband: Fried Green Tomatoes DVD, coffee mug, Van Morrison CD, and an external hard drive on which to back up my computer. Carl called a few moments ago and asked, "What was that computer drive thing you wanted for Christmas?"

I enunciated, "Ex...ter...nal...hard...drive," hoping to make it memorable.

"OK. By the way, did you get something for Bryson from me for Christmas?" Carl asked.

"No, that's your (one and only responsibility in the gift-giving realm) job. I have no clue what Bryson wants. But if you call his parents, Gary (Bryson's dad) is the computer genius that recommended I get an EX...TER...NAL...HARD...DRIVE." I could tell Carl hadn't written anything down, so I was repeating it to embed it in his memory.

I'm sure you can see where this is going, but I promise you--I was too busy for my mind to even trickle NEAR a gutter, let alone flow directly into one.

Carl finally said, "Would you stop saying that. It's distracting."

OK, he said something different than It's distracting, but you get the idea.

Merry Christmas season, happy shopping, try not to go insane in the next week, keep perspective.

4 comments:

Megan said...

Too late I have officially gone insane!!! I think I finally broke today. This staying home business is not for the weak at heart. I am going crazy here. Back to the blog entry the other day, did you find all of your margarita fixings??? If so let me know!! HA HA!!
Love ya
Megan

Just Do It Posterchild said...

I don't know about you, but that entry really offended me (NOT!!!!). I laughed till I almost peed my pants...oops, I probably offended someone else. And what about that ad with the word "Naked" in it.......?????? Aaaahhhhhhhhhhhh, but then my mind is so "in the gutter". Have a great holiday and don't forget to laugh at every little thing you can.....it is suppose to be a great stress reliever and Lord knows we have stress!!
Love ya,
Sheri

Angela said...

Hey Megan! You know the song, "They're coming to take me away, ha ha, to the funny farm..." It's my theme song for the next five days. Yes! I have killer margaritas & plans to hide them in the straight jacket that they "come to take me away" in. Hang in there!

Angela said...

Hey gutter-girl...I mean Sheri! No kidding: between "naked" ads & gutter topics, I temporarily looked Rated R! I'll have to come up with some "dark," serious entries to overcome my budding reputation.
By the way--I'm enjoying the posts you've made. Keep it up!

Ang